Hey, guys! I’m popping
by today (tonight, if I’m being truthful) to say a few words on dialogue.
Nothing too extensive, just a tip or two to keep in mind.
So, in a book, dialogue between people can’t
happen like it happens in the real world. I mean, apart from the fact that you
can’t have your characters say ‘um’, stutter, or repeat the same word(s) (or
repeat the same word(s)) like everybody in real life dialogue does when
talking, you must always remember to move toward whatever point the dialogue is
trying to make. Furthermore, really good dialogue conveys information to the
reader without having to rely on narration. Make sense? If you were to hear two
people carrying on a conversation on the street or in the mall or in a café, it
would probably sound something like this:
“Yeah, so after that I told
her, like, just no.”
“You said that?”
“Yeah! What else was I gonna
say? She just made me so…ugh!”
“I know, I know, but to
be that way about it? C’mon, you could’ve had her just—”
“No, no, you don’t know
how it was. Right there, I seriously thought my brain would start oozing or something. And it’s not the first time!”
“I hear you.”
“Like, my blood was
seriously close to bubbling or whatever.”
“Uh-huh.”
“And I’m not usually
like that, you know? I’m not!”
“Sure.”
“But she just…man!”
As you can see, this
dialogue is going nowhere and tells you nothing other than person #1 is upset
with someone and is telling person #2 about it. Well, I say about it, but you
don’t really know what it is, do you?
This is what I meant by written dialogue can’t be like real life spoken
dialogue, because you’d lose your readers the moment your characters started
talking! Now most of you are probably thinking, Fool! We know this already! To which I’ll say, Great! I await reading some of your character dialogue! If you know
this, good for you, but lots of folks, especially first time writers, don’t grasp
this truth at first. Your dialogue can be as witty or prosy or artistic as you
please, but if it doesn’t move
anywhere it is a waste. You’re allowed more leniency in this when it comes to
description, but dialogue is a tricky thing. Here’s the same conversation from
above revisited as it might be written:
“Yeah, so after that I told
her I was done. That was the last time.”
“You said that?”
“What else was I gonna
say? She’s been on that stuff for too long. I don’t want to be caught up in
that. This is drugs we’re talking about!”
“Well, yeah, but to be
so mean about it? You could’ve—”
“Look, you weren’t
there, you didn’t see her. But you do
know that this isn’t the first, second, or third time! Seeing her like that, again, and arguing with her about
getting the help she needs was infuriating! I refuse to fight with her about her
own problem for the rest of my life.”
Katlyn didn’t say
anything, but nodded her head in reluctant understanding.
Joyce shrugged and
sighed. “So that’s it. I’m done.”
See the difference? The
overall dialogue has been lengthened just a bit for the purpose of flow, but
what were the big changes that made it readable? It moved forward, it conveyed
information and key points through itself, and it was able to present, to a
degree, the sentiments of both Joyce and Katlyn without resorting to the narration
to do so. You weren’t told that Joyce was angry and frustrated and Katlyn was
surprised at it, that was conveyed through the dialogue. And through that brief
exchange, you even learned something about an unnamed third character.
So there you have that. Just a little
something to keep in mind when you’re writing conversations between your own
characters. It’s such a valuable truth to keep in mind, and it saves so much
time in the editing process later. (Trust me, I know.)
Keep
Strong!
