Let us commence Part II forthwith…
Now those of you who
read my previous post will remember (hopefully) the reasons I outlined for
Batman wanting to kill Superman. Most all of them were pretty credible given
that universe and its situation. However, they are all largely overshadowed by
a different reason; one that is far more “in your face” and, frankly, annoying.
And that is, Batman wants to kill Superman…because Lex Luthor is leading him
on!
Now wait a minute, you
might say. What’s so bad about that? Sounds like a pretty good story-line if
you ask me. Well, if we were talking about the Luthor played by Clancy Brown in
the Justice League cartoon of the early 2000’s, you would be totally right! But
we’re not. We’re talking about Jesse Eisenberg. Uncharacteristically weird,
obnoxiously quirky, and appearing to have only hit nineteen the day before his
annoying speech at that gala he threw, the actor’s take on this character was
anything but right. Harsh words, I know, but it’s true.
Lex Luthor is an
accomplished business man, known for his quiet ruthlessness and overwhelming
superiority complex. The thing is, the Lex that we knew (as in from comics and
other media) has the persona to back it up! He’s a genius, more brilliant than
Batman (but in a different way), and absolutely determined in whatever goal he
wishes to achieve. He’s cold and uncaring, and capable of earth-wrecking plans,
while at the same time being smart to avoid certain plans that he could
undertake, but would pose too much of a risk of destroying the planet. *Cough* Doomsday. *Cough* Jesse Eisenburg brings none of that into his portrayal of
the character. I get that they were going for “something different,” but if
that something is garbage, well, it’s garbage!
Never once at any point
of the movie does it feel like this Luthor is in control of any situation. Not
when it was revealed that he had been arranging all those little red notes and
such to rile Batman up (really, ol’ Bruce should have considered that a bit
more closely. He is the World’s Greatest Detective after all.). Not when he
cheated and illegaled his way into getting a hold of General Zod’s body (that
was just… How’d that random senator he was Jolly Ranchering around with even
have the clearance he needed?). Not even when he kidnapped Superman’s mother
and threatened to kill her if Supes didn’t fight Bats (there were so many ways
out of that half-fermented pickle.). My point is, in the interest of being “different”
(I guess), ol’ Zach took Superman’s arch nemeses, one of the handful of normal
humans on the planet that can actually give Kal-El a problem, and allowed him
to go off the rails. Luthor’s character arch is too jumbled and nonsensical throughout
the entire movie. It took me watching it a couple times to even properly
understand what his motivations for wanting Superman dead were. In the cartoons
and comics, Lex hates Superman because one: Lex is jealous of him, of his
awesome power and the fact that so many people look up to him with hope, and
two: Superman was causing him trouble—exposing a plethora of Luthor’s many
illegal activities and thus interfering with his businesses, foiling some of
his exploits for power of his own, etc. In short, he showed Lex up to be the
bad guy when, before, people had looked up to Lex. That’s understandable. That’s
motivation. In Dawn of Justice, Luthor hates Superman because he doesn’t
believe that Superman can be all powerful and be all good, and so wants to
remove him before the “not-so-good” starts to show. (Gosh. I actually made it
sound better in writing than it actually is on screen. Bad execution!)
It’s a mistake they
could actually kinda correct with a recast of the character and thus a change
in tone. It would be a simple matter to do that and then bring across the sense
that being in prison changed Lex, turning him into a more serious character or
whatever. I’ve changed several original thoughts on this movie since I first
saw it in theaters. I will never change my mind about Jesse Eisenberg’s Lex
Luthor.
Now, about Wonder Woman….
That about sums her up.
Plot
Holes.
So, I’ve already
mentioned some plot-holes during my character analysis, but let’s see what else
I can remember. (Slight (sort of) ranting ahead.)
Metropolis and Gotham
being next to one another is a thorn in my side. I know they did it so that
Bruce’s story would have more weight and thus make more sense, but I don’t like
it. Everybody knows that the two cities are leagues apart from one another.
That’s why Bruce always plans a business trip with a private plane whenever
Batman needs to go talk to Superman.
What’s with the Gotham
City Police Department and Batman’s relationship? At first it seems like they’re
not on good terms, but then later in the movie Clark says something like, “The
Bat’s activities are like a one-man reign of terror. And, as far as I can tell,
the police are actually helping him.” Which is it?
And speaking of Clark,
ain’t no way that fella still has a job at the Daily Planet. He never writes
what he’s supposed to, he never does any investigative journalism, and he’s
NEVER AT WORK! When Superman died, nobody noticed that Clark never come back.
So, Luthor’s plan was
to pit Batman and Superman against each other, deeming that one would kill the
other (and apparently never suspecting that they might become super-friends
instead), but more hopefully that Batman would kill Superman? Or maybe I’m
stating that wrong. Was it more that he hoped that Superman would kill Batman,
and thus show the world how “evil” he really is? Has Lex not been watching the
movie he’s a part of? Ninety percent of the story is about the world trying to
decide whether or not they like
Superman at all! Most people actually don’t seem to very much anyway! And so what
if Supes killed the Bat? Aren’t people all afraid of him and think he’s a
vampire villain anyway? Furthermore, just how much did Lex know about Batman’s
capabilities? Sure, he “let” him steal the Kryptonite, but what did he expect
Batman to do with it? And what if Batman had killed Superman? Who would have
stopped Doomsday? The monster would have destroyed the earth! (Just terrible!)
Luthor should have more foresight than that.
Um, why is the mother
of Superman working as a waitress in a diner to make ends meet? Her son could
walk on the bottom of the ocean and bring up a chest of buried treasure for her.
He could tunnel down in the Congo somewhere and return with pounds of pure
gold. Or he could just, I don’t know, fuse some coal into diamond with his bare
hands? That’s messed up. #FairpayforMartha
And speaking of Martha,
that little scene with Batman and Superman when the spear was about to fall…
*Sigh* Enough people have already said everything that could be said on that, I
think.
As for their fight, if those
two became buds so easily, the tussle could have been avoided as easily as…
*Superman lands* “Bruce,
Luthor has my mom!”
*Batman starts* “What?”
*Superman nods, and
gives a sad look (in other words, his face doesn’t change).* “I need your help
to save her. Her name’s Martha and—”
*Batman shouts and disables
all his weapons. He puts his hand to his ear.* “Alfred, locate Martha!”
*Alfred from
communicator* “Why would you say that name, sir?”
*Batman summons the
Batplane and looks at Superman* “It’s his mother’s name.”
Fight over. No problem.
And for my last thing,
how did Luthor find out who both Batman and Superman were? We have no
indication of how he did so, nor is it ever explained. He just knows. How? And
why wouldn’t he use that against them when he was locked up or even before?
Makes no sense.
I could go on with the
plot-holes for a while, but let’s say we leave it there.
Special
Effects/Visual Aesthetics.
I have largely no
complaints here. For the most part, the special effects were pretty solid.
Superman’s flight was displayed pretty well. It looked like he was really soaring
sometimes! I know about the Doomsday/Cave troll thing that people complain about, and that’s
quite fair. There is a resemblance.
But, as far as just being a big monster for
our heroes to punch around on screen, he worked…in that capacity alone. Pretty
much all of Batman’s scenes were great (better than they were in Justice League,
that’s for sure!). The warehouse fight scene was absolutely flawless. For those
timeless seconds of thug-beatdown, he was the Batman through and through.
Wonder Woman’s (five seconds?) of fighting was decent, not bad for such a
limited appearance as she had. I will hand it to Zach that he does seem to know
how to deal out some realistic destruction on a huge scale. I mean, how would
it look in reality if there were beings of such immense power pummeling one
another in downtown Manhattan? Really, if the storyline of the movie had been
half as good as the action and special effects were, we would have gotten a
much better film. But hey, that’s just me…
So there you have it,
my review in detail. This could have been longer, but I don’t really want to go
on for that long with it. Something that should here be understood is
this: Despite all my complaints, I like the movie. I looked forward to it for
so long. I followed every new trailer, read every interesting article leading
up to its release. It was the first time that Batman and Superman shared the
big screen together, and it’s forever going to be a special thing for me. I
bought the two-disc edition, and I’m going to watch it (for the sixth time?)
soon. It might be flawed (it is), but by golly, it’s Batman V Superman!
Keep
Strong!
*Disclaimer. All books,
titles, characters, character names, slogans, logos, and related indicia are
trademarks of and copyright DC Comics and/or Warner Bros.
