Friday, September 30, 2016

An Unfinished Poem

Hey, guys! Hope that you all are having a wondrous Fall (even though it's just beginning). I've returned with another post, and in this one I'm going to do something I've not done before: Share one of my works-in-progress with you! This is rather a big deal for me, as I do not usually do this, but I think that some of you (or at least, I'd like to think that some of you, heh,) would be interested in reading one of my unfinished works. The poem that I'm about to lay down for you is one of my newer ideas sprung from an older seed in my imagination. I really like its concept, and fully intend to bring the tale to its end. The story is a sort of mix of elements both old and new, but both with more me in them. Tell me what you think!

In a time that was upon a time
Far and deep beneath the sea,
Was an aged king without a name
Whose power was his majesty.
Like silken weed was his sable hair.
His beard was long and white.
And his golden eyes could reach beyond
The confines of mortal sight.

His great power was great indeed,
And legends still have told,
Of his many wondrous and terrible deeds
That he did of old.
For the waves of the deep were his to command
And often he would let them roll,
To go toss about some lonely ship
Or to flood a sheltered knoll.

Thus he was cursed by nearly all,
And many held him in fear.
But little and nothing could be availed against him
For his power was without peer.
Hence whenever a breaker swept lives away
Or the tide would not abate,
Naught could be done but to fly and flee
From the power that was too great.

Yet none knew that the nameless king
Was not the might all thought him to be,
And that he was fettered with five, emerald chains
In the bottom of the sea.
With clasps on his limbs and his hardened neck
He was held in such a keep,
Permitted one thousand leagues to roam;
In the darkness of the deep.

Now it happened upon a certain day
As the king walked in silent mood,
That he saw a sight which the secret light
Of the undersea imbued.
A lithe form, swift and fair,
Swept before his face.
And his golden eyes sought for the shape
That had moved with such a grace.

Thus he beheld Lanielia
As she swam in the Deepened Blue.
Who told unto him her fair name
Which no living thing knew.
Her eyes were black, but her skin was clear,
Like a star loosed in its light;
And she was clothed with a league of snowy hair
Like water over pearls in the night.

Then the nameless king was stricken dumb,
For her beauty was piercing yet soft.
And for long he watched her without a word
While the water bore her aloft.
Then at last the king drew near,
Reaching out to touch her hair.
But straightaway she recoiled from him
With disgust that was laid bare.

At such he bristled, and drew nearer still
In his eyes a haughty fire.
But she eluded him with lissome grace
And laughed at his desire.
At her laughter his anger boiled to fury,
And he clutched for her without heed.
But back, back, still back she drew,
Moving with a merciless speed.

With a mighty roar the king gave chase,
And the ground beneath him shook.
For his wrath had stirred the Darkened Deep,
Upon which few had dared to look.
But Lanielia heeded not his wrath,
And upon the waves he stirred she rode,
Till her laughter faded like a dream
The ears of the king to goad.

Yet still he chased after the rumor of her,
For it whispered in the water.
But put to shame in that hour was he
By the elusive Ocean’s Daughter.
A wrenching pull his body shook,
As though he was struck a blast.
And not one step further could his feet take him

For his fetters held him fast.

More to come later!

Keep Strong!


  1. Just one word to describe this poem. "Wow."

    This is an amazing piece!!!

  2. I LOVE it. This is wonderful! Really looking forward to more!

  3. Replies
    1. Thanks, Elessar. The grace of the Valar be with you!

  4. You did an amazing job! I am now complete because of this poem. I am super excited to one day be able to read the finished product. - Makenzie

    1. Aw, you're making me blush! ;) Thanks, Makenzie! Glad you enjoyed it, but I'm even gladder to hear from you! Thanks for stopping by.